Saturday, November 20, 2010

The Nude Jogger

  Yesterday, I told you something I wouldn’t do for money, that reminded me of a time when I worked for a convenient store in Sunnyside, Washington. It was a retired 711. It looked like a 711, but they lost it franchise. The store was bought by someone that didn't want to pay the Southland Corporation thousands of dollars a month for the privilege of having a little sign that says they were a 711.
  So there I was standing at the register when I looked out and a car headed towards me from the parking lot. I figured out what was about to happen and tried to jumped back screaming "@&$?!" at the top of my lungs.
  My manager fired me in his head as I exclaimed that tidbit, but rehired me when the car ended up inside the store and knocking me fifteen feet.
   It was a good job, but a bad night besides that wasn’t the first problem at the store or the last.
   One night, I was wiping the counter off trying to stay awake. When I noticed a man jogging down the street. It wouldn't have been a big deal if it wasn’t for the fact he wore no cloths. I waited a few seconds before calling the police. How do you tell the cops something like that without sounding like your mad?
   "Sunnyside police department."
   I laughed.
   "Yes?" asked the voice on the phone.
   "I really don't know how to report this," I answered.
   "Did you see someone…" she paused to let me answer.
   "Where did you see him sir?"
   I gave the address.
   "Wow, he’s making good time. Which way did he go from there?"
   "North, towards north," I answered.
   "Thank you."
   "Oh, you got to tell me what is going on," demanding to know.
   The dispatcher laughed and said, “The man was across town and they thought that a husband had caught him in bed with his wife, but they couldn't catch up with him to find out.”
   They never caught up with the man but it was the funniest night I had ever worked. They called back later and asked if I had seen the man before. I had to admit I wasn't looking at his face. (Come on! he was naked.)

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